i just wanna soil my oats bro
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
