Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
