Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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