this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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