So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
she told me i tasted like america
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
