I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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