well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Randomize
