he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
