i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
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We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
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I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
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