"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!