She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Randomize