in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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