Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
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Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
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There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
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