i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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