69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Randomize
