Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
party gras won. party gras always wins.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.