it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Life is so much better after having sex.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Randomize
