You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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