have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Randomize
