Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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