I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
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