That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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