The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
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