Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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