her voice is like 435,765 daggers being simultaneously twisted into my eardrum
i'd rather just be hit by a car than answer her phone calls
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
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yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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