i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
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