i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
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