she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Can I color on your dick again?
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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