he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
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all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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