A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
