the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize