new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
