i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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