You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Randomize