I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I feel like people expect me to always be a sarcastic, shade throwing drunk. And you know me, I hate to disappoint.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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