it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
