That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Randomize
