ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
