are you so shy because you have an std?
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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