Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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