My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
