Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The uberlube is also flammable
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize