Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
