and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
