is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I think I sprained my soul last night
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize