just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Randomize
