Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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