I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
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