Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I think your dad took our porno
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Randomize
