My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
