Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize